What do you take for granted in your life?  Instead of continuing to read, take a moment to ask yourself what are the things I take most for granted.  No really, stop…just for a moment.

Ok now that I KNOW all of you did this ;-), but what did you come up with?  Was it your family, your job or money situation, how you live in a country that allows you certain freedoms, is it that you have access to food or water daily at mostly anytime you want, is it that you have people who support you when you need it the most, is it that you have an able mind and body to do anything you set your mind to?  I am sure you came up with some great examples or ideas of the millions of things we can take for granted, but was one of those things on your list the air you breath?  I wanted to focus on breathing for this blog because it is something that is so very important in our lives and it is the only habitual body process that we can take control of or let the body continue the work for us without our thinking about it.  For example other body functions such as how many times your heart will beat is something  we don’t voluntarily take control of (yes we can lower our beats per minute thru certain things we do but we are not controlling it voluntarily), or how fast your blood flows through your body, or how your kidneys process and remove waste in your body.

There are so many ways that our body gets stressed out and by not getting enough air into our body we are depriving our body to function at its maximal efficiency.  The thing about our stress levels is that we are the ones usually making those levels worse.  Yes, first by continually to dwell on the instances that stress us out, but also by our body will imitate what we are feeling.  When you get stressed, have you ever noticed how you tense up your muscles more and that you take more shallow (small/shorter) breaths?  Thus not getting enough oxygen into your lungs which inturn will not be getting to your cells to help fuel your body.   And the endless cycle happens; keeping your body stressed and your mind taxed as you keep asking yourself why you feel fatigued or stressed out.

I ran a 5k a week ago and I don’t run very much anymore. I usually am doing more low impact exercises such as using the elliptical, bicycling/spinning class, or playing ice hockey.  The reason I bring this up is while I do work out and I am in a certain type of shape my running shape wasn’t up to where I would like it to be.  But before the race I decided to focus more on my breathing technique to utilize my diaphragm more and get more oxygen into my lungs.  I had set the goal to breathe only through my nose the whole race to help me focus on utilizing my diaphragm more.  I was very surprised how well I performed and how I wasn’t as worn out during and after the race. One of the most effective ways to get a good amount of oxygen into our lungs is to use our diaphragm.   The diaphragm is the large muscle under our lungs, and the most correct way to use it is by expanding it when we inhale and decreasing it when we exhale.  Most people do it the opposite way.  The reason it is important to get a deep breath in our lungs is we are only using a small portion of our lungs.  Most people are only using the top to middle half of their lungs.  When we are upright (standing up, sitting up) gravity works by pooling a good portion of blood at the bottom parts of the lungs, and when we do not expand our lungs enough we are not able to get oxygen to more of our blood.

If I lost you just think of this, the more air you get in your lungs (the deeper you can inhale and exhale) the better you can fuel your body.  Most people when they breathe do chest breathing, they only raise the chest and neck when breathing, thus not being able to expand the lungs as far.  Don’t take my word for it though try this now, breathe in and out of your mouth and raise your chest focusing solely on breathing thru your rib cage. See how much air you get in and how it feels.  Ok, now that you have felt that, put one of your hands underneath the center of your ribcage which will be where your diaphragm is located, breath in thru your nose and work to focus on having your stomach expand on your inhale and now raise your chest towards the mid part of your breath.  As you breathe out, breathe out thru your nose and focus on pushing that stomach in (gently this is not about flexing and pushing hard) and letting your rib cage relax back to its normal position.

Our body is a machine and everything is interconnected, and we don’t have to get into all the physiological (body) processes that occur on a subatomic level.  We just have to know that when we breathe it is about using everything in the most efficient manner possible.  So think of it this way: the first part of the breath is expanding our stomach in the inhale as we use our diaphragm to pull oxygen down into our lungs, next our ribs (a muscle called the intercostals) will expand to help get even more oxygen into the lungs.  Now while I spent so much time on this is because the better you breathe the more oxygen you get into your body.  It is amazing how freeing oxygen is.  There have been studies linked to getting more oxygen in our bodies and how it has helped lower blood pressure, helped people think better and do better on exams, made heart attack patients less likely to have another, how it helps strengthen our immune system, among many other benefits.

I always found this peculiar, but it makes total sense, that the root definition of spirit is breath.   And while I am not saying breathing is our spirit, life is within a breath as it is an awakening.  When I am working with my life coaching clients and I can hear or see the stress in their bodies I tell them to take a deep breath and let it out slowly and repeat.  A single efficient breath is a freeing thing as it helps us to step back from the problem and to let go of the stress psychologically (in the mind) and as we talked about physiologically (in the body).

So now that you know how to breathe more efficiently, next time you are feeling stressed take deeper breaths, next time you are stuck on a problem at work or school take deeper breaths, next time you are working out whether doing cardio or weights take deeper breaths, next time you are doing your daily activities take deeper breaths.  There is a saying that life is not about how many breaths we take but in how many moments in life take our breath away.  While it may sound simple, taking a deeper breath is synonymous with taking more out of this life.  So breathe deeper, enjoy your life, and fill your life up as you replenish your spirit.

Let me know what you thought and if you applied this how it helped you out in your life.  Love this moment, live in this moment, take a deeper breath and feel better.  Here is to continually living Strong Within.

© 2013 Chris O’Hearn all rights reserved

Now I am not perfect and I have my bad days, and I forget about the blessings I have been giving- that this day ahead of me is mine, and it is mine to dream and do with it what I may, and that anything and everything is possible.  But I have continually worked to create a habit, for those times when not feeling as strong, with myself and the life coaching clients I work with to remember that there are NO ordinary days, that a day is not “just” good but amazing!!!  That a day is your canvas upon which you will put your life brush upon and create a stunning “life” of art.

Just like the old saying we are what we eat, the same goes for what we say, what we think, and what we continually do.  Words are powerful, and when you say that this day isn’t amazing because amazing is something so out of the ordinary, then we miss the fact that WE are the ones who decide to make our day/s amazing or not.  No circumstance or situation will EVER decide that for you, and if you are waiting for the situation to continually make your days and your life amazing you will be waiting a very long time.  And you will never be in control of your life or your happiness because you will be waiting for someone or something else to make you happy.

I would like to challenge you when you go to bed to think about all the great things you did in this day, to leave the negative behind and not stew over it. To remember how you made this day great and what you are grateful for.  Doing this positive act before bed, will give you energy when you wake up in the morning.  We are in control of our dreams by the things we think about before sleep.  And I want to challenge you to take that energy when you wake up and think, say, and do something positive.  To say “this is one more day I have been blessed, there is no other day like this, and I will give my best to make this day amazing!”  You will not only change your day, but you will change the direction of your life.

Let me know what you think, and let me know your success in doing this.  When I work with my life coaching clients I remind them that the amazing life we want takes action.  Don’t be like the rest of the world who stands around and hopes.  Have hope for the future by doing today what others will not.  Tell a different story that says this day is amazing! I know you will begin to see the more you do this, and the more you believe it, the more you will find your day stepping away from the so called ordinary to an amazing day/ life.  There is no other day like this.  There will never be a chance to get this moment back, and when we realize this we can take hold of this moment like a child and become involved in the beauty of each task and every moment that is at hand.  Sending great vibes, and thoughts your way for the beginning of your awesome day and life!

Would love if you took a moment out of your time to comment on this blog and let me know what you think.  Thanks!

© 2013 Chris O’Hearn all rights reserved

Let’s be frank, the reason people look through a problem focused lens is: it’s easier. It’s harder to individualize and step back to see the bigger picture and ask questions that search for the solution instead of focusing on the problems. I get in this argument all the time – well aren’t both of those arguments the same? I say no. The reason being is a problem focused outlook will look at the weakness and ask how do we get over, through, or around this obstacle; and the solution based approach will look at the strengths a person has and say what if there was no obstacle (for sometimes the obstacle was created because we decided it was there)? Each outlook comes from opposite sides of the spectrum.

It is my belief and experience that when using a problem focused lens I am limiting and focusing on negativity first. When I step back and take a bigger look at my strengths and the strengths of those involved in the issue I come with an open heart, mind, body and spirit. I am more positive, realistic, optimistic and open to an amazing solution/s. I saw a TV show the other day that focused on the concept of radical honesty. Meaning that they would say what was on their mind at all times and not hold back, no matter how tough or mean it was. I think honesty is a good thing but what I saw in this episode was pure pessimism. Where it was ok to tear another person down because they (the radically honest people) were feeling that way. I saw their radically honesty not as truth but the easy way out to see problems as they are instead of looking through the lens of seeing the world how we want it to be.

Life is simpler than we make it. The more we look towards what we want the more we will transition to have those things we want in our lives. So, I want to ask the question of “are you looking at life through a problem based approach or solution based method?” There is no one right way, but one way will foster more efficient results than the other. I don’t think it should be an all or nothing stance, but how can we find balance in both ways. I can guarantee about 75-95% of people on this earth work with a problem focused approach towards reaching a goal. BE DIFFERENT! So if we were to take a solution based outlook towards our lives what would it entail?

1) Figure out your strengths. We go throughout our life not really knowing who we are and what characteristics are natural to us and which ones we need a little more work on. In my life coaching practice I ask a question that a lot of my clients don’t have an answer to- What are your strengths? I will get answers like I don’t really know, I haven’t thought about it, or I get even answers that label what they do not who they are underneath such as I am good at sports, or I am a good lawyer, teacher, mother, etc. I am not saying stating your profession is bad but it doesn’t tell me who you are. Like a teacher might be strong in kindness, have a great social presence, have perspective, and great leadership qualities. Everyone is different and we all value and embody our strengths differently. When we know what characteristics are strong within us we can figure out why we do things, what is important to us, and how to move forward in ways that are congruent and not hinder some to who we are.

2) Look backwards. We look towards the problem first and ask questions like what is going wrong, how come this doesn’t work, what’s the problem etc. What if we asked a different question looking at the end first (the solution)? What if there were no obstacles in my way how would this look, am I utilizing or underutilizing my strengths in this endeavor, what is my main goal here?

3) Apply your solutions and new outlook. Now while this sounds simple and self-explanatory it gets overlooked quite often. We love to plan and think things out, write things down, get advice, etc. but we move on to the next problem before applying our full efforts into the endeavor. Maybe it might be utilizing a little more perseverance or bravery into the matter. Each person is different, and we all value our strengths differently. There is one word I hear over and over again that can be a hindrance towards reaching a goal… I will TRY. There is nothing inherently wrong with the word TRY, but TRYING gives us a way out. Don’t TRY; go beyond and DO.

Let me know what you think about this by commenting on my page. Would love to have a discussion and hear your thoughts about this. If you have been considering life coaching fill out my free session application or contact me directly at chris@strongwithin.com . Would love to help you in creating a purpose and total wellness plan to fill in the areas of your life you feel are missing. Make it a great day, and create a Strong Within life by seeing how you can look at the issue differently to more solution oriented approaches and answers.

Are you living a life of no regrets?
In life I see a lot of unhappiness and unsatisfied people.  A question that begs to be asked is are you living a life with no regrets, are you doing what you want and sharing your full emotions with all those around you, or are you finding yourself wishing for another chance to make it right?

Sometimes I think we wish life was like technology.  Like with our DVD/Blu-Ray players you can hit pause at anytime, you can rewind or fast-forward with the push of a button; our video game systems give us the chance to have another life or lives and do it all over again.  While we can always change our direction in life, and we can choose how we want to feel at each moment; there are some places with no do overs. There is a passage that slips thru our fingers in this physical realm that we will not be able to access after certain things pass us by such as death.  While I believe we all are connected and that we can be in contact with spirits that have passed on, while we are still on earth, I do know we only have one chance to experience the physical aspects of those we love right now.

Now this is not to down you, but just to remind you of the fragility of our lives and how we can find true peace when someone we love leaves us.  Death is actually a measurement of time to help us make sure we DO NOT take our lives lightly and to help us put priority and purpose upon our time on this earth. So, have you taken the time to sit down and listen to the ones you love, have you taken the time to give them hugs just because, have you taken the time to give them a call and see how they are when you can’t be near them, or have you told them that you love them? Yes while this will be a great thing for their happiness, in the end it really will calm our souls and wishings for a do over, as we will have no regrets if that time ever comes too soon… and it always does come too soon (we want our friends and families to live forever).

From personal experience it is funny how the little things sometimes hit you the hardest, like grandpa riding on his lawn tractor going out to fill the bird houses to feed the birds and squirrels every day. How I still had so many other questions to ask like about your childhood, what your friends did for fun and what mischief you caused, what it was like living in the depression era of the 1930’s, and being thru the second World War (I know he wouldn’t talk about this for he never did, but I still always wanted to know the good things about his travels). I found so much hope and resilience when looking at the people who came from that time and how they made amazing lives after such tragedies.  And while we did talk about those things I still find myself yearning to be able to ask him again.

Since he has passed, I do wish I had one more chance to chat with him. To physically sit down and look him in the eyes.  I know he knew I loved him, for the last time I saw him I was fixing something at his house, but it is funny how the only way I see his smile now is in my mind.  In each moment we choose to find happiness or to find a way to be unhappy. We cannot focus on two things at once.  While I don’t know exactly what is on the other side, I do know that the unknown has something so much more than this physical realm. Just by hearing all the stories that cannot be explained, learning about all the energies and waves that years ago would have been thought witchcraft (such as frequencies, energies, waves, cell phones, or radios, etc). Religion and science are not each others enemies, but allies in finding the absolute truth. Some will call it heaven, the after life, nirvana, reincarnation, beyond, or the great unknown, but I will not get caught up in semantics of word play as I will find joy and peace in spreading the great love my grandfather shared with me.

When we do pass on to our next adventure I know it will be something we could never comprehend.  But what I do know is that those who have passed are never gone as they live in the smiles, the acts of kindness, the love that we pass on thru our continual focus on the great things they taught us.

While it may be hard to find happiness in the situation, remember it is not in “why were they taken?” But in the gladness we had the chance to know them while they were here.  Don’t let the negativity destroy you, for this is not the end.  We can choose to grieve for a second or for the rest of our lives, it’s all the same.  Don’t be wishing for a do-over for your life. Grieve healthfully and continue on so you don’t miss the other times and best parts of your life.  Today is the chance to remember the blessings, the lessons, and the loves we have and have to share with all we come in contact.  This present moment is all we are guaranteed.  Don’t wait until it’s too late to do what we wished; this is your chance to live a life with no regrets.  To make every day your best day. So make time and take time out to love the ones your with, and remember we will all soon be one again.

This is a poem I wrote for the ceremony for my grandfather. Thanks for taking the time to read my blog, it is my hope you find what you are looking for out of this post.

God’s doors have been opened,
To welcome another angel home,
A transition from one part to the next has been set in motion,
Only the destination changed,
For the journey is not over,
It is good that we remember you are not gone,
As you realize your true spirit,
Shedding the rust of old,
We carry your example through the acts of our lives,
By embodying the principles you taught us,
About caring, about giving, about being humble,
A life lived is not one of possessions but of love,
And love you did, and we love you for it,
We will not be sad or sorrowful that you are gone,
But glad we had the chance to know you,
Your life blessed so many,
So let us honor and remember you by,
Living, laughing, and loving every moment we are blessed,
Knowing this angel is standing guard at the gates,
Waiting to welcome us home.
 
CJO (12-12-2012)

© 2012 Chris O’Hearn all rights reserved

I wanted to commemorate this blog post to the late great uplifter Zig Ziglar. He passed away last week, and he was one of my influences that got me into wanting to be a life coach. If you don’t know him you should check out some of his quotes if not his books and ideas.  I wanted to start this blog off with a quote of his:

“A lot of people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job.”

Now this blog is not necessarily going to be about work and finding a job (but with the way the economy is maybe I should ;-) sorry I know the election is over), but it will be more about the business of your life.  I think many of the problems we have are due to thinking when we change the situation or circumstance things will be ok and life will all be amazing.  Now, while I do believe there are no coincidence (when we actually open our eyes and take notice of patterns and signs in our life), I do believe we have to put in some sort of work and not just wish or wait for luck to happen to us.

The metaphor that I see in this quote is: life is not just about surviving but about continually searching and traveling the path. There is a saying I like that says “be happy where you are; don’t be content but always be happy where you are.” We ask for just enough money to get by, we ask for someone to come into our life so we won’t feel so alone, or maybe we negatively ask for things just as much.  Such as the person who says I don’t want to be fat, poor, or stupid anymore. Yes it may sound harsh but we can be our own worst critics.  And by us focusing negatively, we actually are not asking for what we want but asking for what we don’t want, thus getting more of what we don’t want and continually feeling bad about it. Which continues our endless loop of disappointment.

The real question with your life is… are you just doing enough to get by?  Our life will give us exactly what we ask of it… so are you selling yourself and your life short by only trying to get by?  Life is utterly amazing when we focus our mind on what we want.  But I would say a good portion of us stop at the place where we have our eyes or mind set upon. We get what we asked for (or close to what we asked for) and when we think we have arrived at the answer we needed the rest will begin to fall in place.  In our short sightedness we forget it’s not just about passing to get that good mark we want (in school, life, work, etc), or working just hard enough to get that promotion we wanted and then going back to our old habits and ways, or for whatever aspect in our life we desire but feel we are unworthy or can’t have so we just settle.

We have forgotten that one part of our happiness is remembering our purpose through MASTERING our life. Those who take that extra step, those who not only think about how to get there but how to maintain and grow, those who believe in their best in every moment will be empowered the best qualities in life because it was less about getting and it was more about becoming.

Let’s take a look at a few struggles people may have and I will show you that even while the situations may be different the outcome will always be the same.  The alcoholic abstaining from alcohol is only the beginning. They must learn how to maintain that behavior.  The person stepping on the scale focusing on weight loss instead of becoming healthy (mentally, physically,spiritually-Holistically) will be reminded time and time again that success is derived in changing their lifestyle habits (internally and externally) not jumping on the quick fad diet, or finding that one perfect exercise, or even taking that pill (It’s ironic that on the label it says “works best with a healthy diet and exercise”).  Lastly going back to the quote we started with, those looking for success will find it is about going past what we set out to do. To have what we want will never be about making it to the destination, but on how we continue on the journey.

I know there will be those who will come back and say “well if that is the case it sounds like I will never find happiness because I will continually be searching for my next mountain to conquer; I will be on an endless conquest.”  However I am not saying to conquer every situation, but to understand you are already perfect and amazing…right now!  It’s about opening the jar to your potential as you already are; to become who you were intended to be; to ALLOW yourself to focus less on surviving and more on mastering your happiness and place in life. Not only going the distance, but by maintaining the habits you acquired to get there, and continuing to not only look ahead but to keep moving forward.  Life is the wakened state of putting consistent continual action towards our dreams. Keep dreaming friends; it’s one of the most enjoyable things we can partake in. Just don’t stop with the dream and put your best life forward every moment.

Let me know what you think in the comments section would love to hear your comments, stories, or ideas.

© 2012 Chris O’Hearn all rights reserved

It can be so easy to get lost in ourselves and miss the great things that are right in front of our eyes. I hope this video makes you think a little differently, I hope this video will reopen your eyes to what is important in your life, and that you not only pass on your amazing gifts and experiences with those around you, but that you also take the time to learn and let others share their amazingness with you.

Would love to hear your experiences or thoughts on this matter. I am thankful for all of you, so let us all remember our blessings every moment and keep putting our best life forward! Much love and peace to you all!

Sorry about the quality of the video, I am not sure how to make it look better on YouTube… I am going to have to learn a few more things about videos and uploading I guess. It’s more about the message; you don’t need to see my mug anyways ;-)

CLICK ON THE VIDEO TO WATCH

© 2012 Chris O’Hearn all rights reserved

]]> http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/11/23/vlog-authentic-listening-in-our-meetings-greetings/feed/ 0 http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/11/02/vlog-bookmarks-of-negativity/ http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/11/02/vlog-bookmarks-of-negativity/#comments Fri, 02 Nov 2012 03:10:12 +0000 Chris http://www.strongwithin.com/?p=379 Continue reading →]]> I am heading out on vacation tomorrow and I wanted to get something out to you guys before I left.  I hope this reaches you well. It was a little rushed since I am pressed for time at the moment, and I’m still learning how to work my video editing software.  That will def be a long road.  I wanted to talk about how it is so easy for us to come back to that negativity in our mind, how we put bookmarks there so we can find the darkness, the I told you so, that negativity that keeps us from moving forward.  In life it so much easier to let the nay-sayers of our lives hold us back from reaching our real selves, our true potential, and those nay-sayers a lot of times are ourselves.  Look at where your focus is, and maybe take another angle and look at how something is possible rather than looking for ways to prove yourself right about not succeeding. You will decide what you can and can’t have; Take a look at where and what your focus is currently on.

Have an amazing day and let me know what you think of the video by commenting here. Let me know a time that you overcame the odds by telling a different story. Looking forward to chatting with you all and hearing about all your awesome stories of success. Make it an amazing day!

 

© 2012 Chris O’Hearn all rights reserved

]]> http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/11/02/vlog-bookmarks-of-negativity/feed/ 6 http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/08/16/forward-moving-thoughts-1-mediocrity-is-for-the-weak-minded/ http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/08/16/forward-moving-thoughts-1-mediocrity-is-for-the-weak-minded/#comments Thu, 16 Aug 2012 16:43:04 +0000 Chris http://www.strongwithin.com/?p=375 Continue reading →]]> Are you respecting your plan for life?  Are you keeping true to yourself and the dreams you had for it? With all the obstacles, all the nay-sayers, and all the negative thoughts that are running through our head’s each day; it can be easy to forget about our dreams.

Take hold of your dream, no matter how ridiculous people say you are for believing it.  They are not you, and you don’t want to live their mediocre life anyways.  You were intended for greatness.  You are one of a kind, you are an amazing essence on this earth with your brush of life making its mark, and you are a person who follows through on their commitments. Especially the commitments you made to yourself. Grab your dream, and bring some reality to it by setting a plan to work on it every day.  And wake up in love with your life and your dreams as you move one step closer each day… no matter how small that step is… keep moving purposefully and you will make it your reality.

Put your best life forward… starting right now

 

© 2012 Chris O’Hearn all rights reserved

]]> http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/08/16/forward-moving-thoughts-1-mediocrity-is-for-the-weak-minded/feed/ 3 http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/07/25/personal-development-challenge-week-23-beating-your-best-not-others/ http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/07/25/personal-development-challenge-week-23-beating-your-best-not-others/#comments Wed, 25 Jul 2012 03:21:02 +0000 Chris http://www.strongwithin.com/?p=369 Continue reading →]]>

“A good soldier is not violent.
A good fighter is not angry.
Good winners do not contend.
Good employers serve their workers.
The best leader follows the will of the people.

All of them embody the virtue of noncompetition.
This is called the virtue of noncontending.
This is called employing the power of others.

This since ancient times has been known
as the ultimate unity with heaven.”

Tao Te Ching, Lao-tzu

 This quote got me thinking about the dualities of this world we contend with.  That to be good at something we have to do whatever is necessary to get what we want, or to have something it is about fighting. In my time in the corporate world, and seeing the office politics, it was common ground to see those who would step on anyone to get what they wanted.  And while some of those did get the promotion of money or title they actually lost in the end.

Like the saying, “what good is it to gain the whole world if you lose your soul in the process?”  We have forgotten the faces of truth, and character, and of inner beauty as we mar up the earth with our need to beat out another, in our need to push someone down to get what we want, in our belief that winning means there needs to be a loser.  The prize at the end of the day is not if you achieved the “thing,” but that you found and kept true to “self” in the process.  If you were able to find self, you will find the greatest gift that has eluded so many upon this human existence… inner peace and life purpose.

There is a saying I try to remember in my life daily- “it’s not about being better to beat another but about being our best.”  So what if you beat someone, does it really make you better? You don’t know their skill levels, you don’t know what they went through, you don’t know their struggles, you don’t know their strengths.  In the end if you are looking to beat another out of something you are not being true to a maxim of happiness in life. When we do our best (for self and not to beat another) we CANNOT be unhappy/unsatisfied for we did all we could.  Life is and NEVER will be about hording what is ours (or what we want to be ours) since this world has plenty to go around and offer. This world is ever abundant with gifts. We all have a different path, and if only we learned to embrace the struggles, the joys, and the lessons along the way we would be able to see that life is not about becoming one away from others… but becoming ONE, WHOLE with ALL.

So, how can you be a good follower, how can you be a good leader, how can you be “unified with heaven” as you care about each and everyone not just one?  You have been put on this earth to succeed, and you have been put on this earth to HELP others see amazingness at work; being an uplifting energy to help those around you find their true beauty.  We are ALL connected and will remain in the pits of hell together until we can let go of our fears of losing out, our fears of being alone and holding onto things greedily, until we can let go of our insecurities by TRYING to prove we are above those around us.  You are an amazing gift in this world, and I am looking forward to working with all of you together as we lift each other up and help bring out the best not just in ourselves but in all.

Challenge:

1)Find at least one person that you may not normally go out of your way for (it might be too easy for you to choose a friend), and find a way to help them this week (whether they know it or not).

2)Ask yourself, how can I be at my best today? Not to be better or to prove anything to anyone else, but because when I do my best I feel amazing.

3)Lastly how can you go out of your way for those who are closest to you?  Whether it just be as simple as a kind word, or taking some time off to help them reach their goals.  It is so easy to take those who are closest to us for granted… Remember those who have put up with your B.S., they deserve some respect for that alone ;)

So, let me know what you thought by commenting below.  Would love to open a dialogue to hear your thoughts and ideas on this matter.

© 2012 Chris O’Hearn all rights reserved

]]> http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/07/25/personal-development-challenge-week-23-beating-your-best-not-others/feed/ 3 http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/07/10/personal-growth-challenge-week-22-would-you-rather-be-right-or-rather-be-happy/ http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/07/10/personal-growth-challenge-week-22-would-you-rather-be-right-or-rather-be-happy/#comments Tue, 10 Jul 2012 04:01:44 +0000 Chris http://www.strongwithin.com/?p=366 Continue reading →]]> It’s been awhile since I have written a blog.  A lot has been on my plate so forgive me for not reaching out to you.  I wanted to get something out to you as a quick reminder for enjoying your summer.  This blog’s main premise is on a quote I like… “Never argue with a fool.  They will not only drag you down to your level, but beat you with experience every time.”

Now I am not saying you should be judging who is smarter or dumber than you, but what is the purpose of life?  I think it is simple-Life is about being happy.  You can be happy or you can be right.  What I mean is that you can try and argue your point or your stance to someone and be unhappy trying to prove something to someone who isn’t even listening anyways.  They are just trying to prove their point to you, thus continuing the endless circle as you try to prove your point.  Happiness doesn’t come from proving people wrong, but in knowing you don’t have to prove you are right to anyone.  The ego craves to show people you are important, you are smart, or whatever self-seeking approval we are looking for externally.  SO what are you trying to prove really; does external satisfaction really make you happy? What if you looked to have internal satisfaction, something that you can never prove or show to anyone besides showing your smile.

Next time you are finding yourself trying to prove something that might be a waste of your time take notice how you feel.  Do you feel good arguing, or does it mess with your energy and keep you from finding peace in this moment (if not your day)?  Life is not about winning the battles with others, but finding the peace within to overcome the battles of the day altogether to win the war.  Now I don’t consider life about winning a war, but who doesn’t love a good cliché? ;)  There will always be discussions to educate those around us and for us to learn as well.  It’s just a different way of looking at things to help you enjoy this moment, enjoy your life more fully, and to leave the stress and strife on the shoulder of life’s highway as you blow by.  Expand yourself; don’t shrink and you will find that life is so much more satisfying as you put your best life forward.

Challenge:

1)  Next time you find yourself arguing become aware of what your intentions are? Is it self-seeking, to prove someone wrong, to be right, just to argue, or are you helping all parties to find the best possible answer even if it’s not yours?

2) Step back from the situation and come back to it again later, if need be, when emotions are out of it and you have thought more logically.  Sometimes just doing one thing different such as stepping away and coming back might be the break both parties need to think logically.

3) Ask yourself, do I have to be right at any cost? Is it more about me wanting to be right or do I want happiness in my every moment.

© 2012 Chris O’Hearn all rights reserved

]]> http://www.strongwithin.com/2012/07/10/personal-growth-challenge-week-22-would-you-rather-be-right-or-rather-be-happy/feed/ 0